Monday, August 3, 2009

Tim Tebow is a virgin! What?!

When questioned about his sex life two weeks ago, Tim Tebow told the world that he is waiting for marriage. A trivial fact, except for the 'Virgin Gator's' stats:
  • 6'2", 238 lbs of solid steel
  • 183.2 career QB rating: 65.8% of passes completed for 6159 yards and 67 touchdowns; only 11 interceptions
  • 4.3 yards a carry over 2037 yards and 43 touchdowns
  • Only true sophomore ever to win the Heisman Trophy
  • Returning for his senior season for a chance to win a second consecutive national championship
Tim Tebow is a stud. But where are all his women?

What possesses this man?

Seriously. From a strictly objective perspective, this man could sleep with ninety percent of college-aged women. The college dating environment is loose and fast. Hookups are plentiful and noncommittal. Why would he not take advantage?

  • He's gay: Then again, it can also be assumed that ninety percent of gay men would sleep with Mr. Tebow.
  • He's lying: It seems a little evangelical praise hardly outweighs the ridicule he is sure to endure.
  • He's impotent: Ha ha.
  • He's been seduced by religion: The man does have strong religious convictions. Still, several major religions condemn pre-marital sex and many of their followers do it all the time.
What could be better than sex?

Sex is the pinnacle of the human experience, it therefore makes no sense that Mr. Tebow chooses to postpone it. The 'Virgin Gator' has clearly found something better than sex.
He has found a better kind of sex.

Even casual sex cannot conceal the incredible intimacy of intercourse. No action more powerfully expresses love. Tim has decided that he won't sell that intimacy on the cheap. He has elected to share himself in that way with only one woman—And he wants to guarantee it to her by marrying her first. A lot of people can't handle that; but it is beautiful beyond words.

Bottom Line

This man is impressive. He does what few people (in his position or otherwise) have the balls guts to do: He acts according to his principles. The plethora of available women and his public stature only amplify the rare conviction he has shown.

1 comment:

  1. I like this. I like your use of logic in this one.